Oddbean new post about | logout
 I know, I love and adore her. 
 Do we know what really happened? Was someone being a dick? 
 Someone disagreed with her about seed oils and she got triggered over nothing. Thats how I saw it.

Had nothing to do with anyone being an asshole or male/'female. 
 plus the dude from hours ago that abused her because she came to my defence 
 We all need to pay attention to Rapoport's advice on constructive disagreement:

https://rationalwiki.org/wiki/Rapoport's_Rules

Especially in text media with no emotion-conveying side-channels.

I know I do...!

nostr:nevent1qqsz8tahgyqct5zyuhdy3d6xhwxsurvxqesfq4vxgtfvgqhyelrj8wspr9mhxue69uhhqatjv9mxjerp9ehx7um5wghxcctwvspzqfx8sxfhe2h4mu0x5fypldtdz6dtf8zq70344cjjrrzna9tjgz7eqvzqqqqqqyqqm6qd 
 Some people just wanna be edgelords though. Mature conversation is not what they’re here for. 
 This is a problem, too.

Marie's yesterday's insulter is pure edgelord, that can't be fixed except by muting.

The seed oil thread that triggered Noshole was much less so, and drama could have been 100% avoided with better constructive disagreement skills. 
 It seemed to me Shishi wanted to be rude. I don’t believe they wanted to be so rude that Noshole would leave Nostr. But I don’t get the impression that having a mature conversation was a priority. 

Not quite edgelord material maybe, and not comparable rudeness to Joel. But still intentionally rude. 

Rapoport’s rules ensure clear communication of IDEAS. But if intents and emotions are what you’re trying to convey over ideas, then being rude is an extremely effective communication tool. They got their point across. 
 I think a lot of otherwise-good people get "communicating ideas" and "communicating emotional reactions" confused. Especially when feeling "triggered" themselves". Its the Spirit of our Age, truly. I think people took responsibility for their own feelings better even when I was a teenager in the late 90s.

So that's a third problem.



1- Don't be an Edgelord

2- Your feelings are your problem to solve, not your conversation partner's

3- Disagree constructively