I quite like the name Javier, but that's just me. I like his sideburns, don't see many people with sideburns, they seem trustworthy to me, but you can't go around basing things on someones sideburns, that wouldn't be wise.  

 I agree the sideburns and crazy hair are tempting. The chainsaw really made be swoon. 

 The chainsaw was a good gimmick man, you have to give him that. Imagine Biden with a chainsaw, you just can't like.  

 They wouldn't let the man anywhere near one. It would be the first presidential self-assassination.

Wait a second. 

 Just start leaving chainsaws around EVERYWHERE, like in his bedroom, and in the bath, in the closet XD .  

 Biden opening his gifts on his birthday : 

'Thanks but I already have 143 chainsaws, why do you people keep giving me the same gift? ' 
'Also where am I , who am I , is this my shit in my pants? '