Because I was confronted recently with another one and this time I was able to see beyond the facade and exit before being all trapped. For the dance to happen, I have to allow it. No judge or blame here. People are who they are and I don't blame him. But I have to accept the dance to be in it. And I won't allow it no more.  

 that is amazing and i'm so happy for you~! the fact that you recognize this and can act on it is a profound achievement. keeping your space clean and peaceful is the best way to have room for someone special if/when he appears. and if not, a clean space is a contented space.
good for you on asserting your boundaries.  ^____^