Oddbean new post about login | logout Apologies are not necessary, they obviously aren’t ready to put the past behind and move on…yet.
As a healthy outsider who deeply understand the toxic dynamics in the family my presence is actually destabilizing to the family structure. The apology is more about gaining control over me again, which I’m obviously not going to let happen.
Good choice. It's not that you are holding a grudge. In fact, it sound as if you have forgiven them. That doesn't mean you need to forget. And yes, it really sounds as if they are demanding control with an apology. Btw, did they offer an apology for their actions?
lol no of course not. This isn’t a mutual thing of hey let’s all forgive and forget and put the past behind us. It’s very much a narcissistic you need to apologize to me thing.
What's hilarious is how they still believe they are right, and that means they think you are wrong and need to 'see the light' and to be repentant for it. Nope, not happening. One day, if they are lucky, they might realize it had nothing to do with you wanting to be right, but instead the world has changed and they are on a sinking ship. They are simply angry that you took the life boat. 🤣