When I was at this place in my life as a teenager one day I was at the end of my rope and the thought occurred to me “well I can always take the easy way out later so why don’t I just see how it goes a while longer” and I was never that close to the edge again. A moment of clarity and helping each other find that moment is critical. Maybe just a post on nostr saved a life. 

 Psilocybin mushrooms helped me here.  "I control the gameboard and the piece.  I can stop playing at any time if I wish.  Fuck it, may as well keep playing for now and see where it leads."