Are there any reliable lnbits or cashu nodes that can handle large number of users? I don't want to push users to instances that will just rug damus users in the end. This is a serious decision we have to make. If the solution is just let your friends suggest instances, there is a bootstrap issue.
There are many mints now. You can discover them easily via nostr. Check how nutzap.me does it for example
I tried to use that but I couldn't withdraw anything
honestly no. there are currently no suitable options for this. but that may be for the best to avoid centralizing