Based on the women I have known, far more men than women think what you just said.
Most women involved in stripping or porn or sex work don't feel abused. They do it for the easy money, and they think that the men who they provide a service to are getting the raw deal. I've heard such women express bewilderment as to why a man would pay money for such a fleeting simple thing leaving him worse off a short while later. They feel like the abusers, abusing the impulsive and shallow nature of men.
Occasionally a religious kind of man will come into a strip club and tell the woman something like "you don't have to do this ya know, you're better than this." Strippers take offense at that kind of thing. It's underhandedly degrading. You are telling them that they are filth and should clean up, while at the same time watching them strip. I'm on the side of those strippers. Call the bouncer, kick those men out. They choose to see the woman as lesser, as filth. The women do not feel this of themselves, they do not feel like filth, they feel beautiful and they are earning a living.
And when I recognized that I concluded that (in the main) nobody is the abuser. Stripping, porn, sex work... it is a mutual voluntary thing. It's a job.
Now you can conclude that they are "complete trash" so I can't say you are wrong. That is subjective, it is your choice. You can say it is a mental disorder, but I think that is going too far. Sure some women would never do that, but every person is different, and I don't think we should pathologize our differences.
Also, there are plenty of cases of forced sex work, of sex trafficking, of child trafficking, of abused women turning to this line of work when they didn't really want to. So that is a real thing. But so is it a real thing the women who just really like having sex, really like being on camera, etc.
Over the last 5 years or so I've seen a kind of puritanical movement arise among right wing men. Rejection of porn especially, something that nobody ever rejected (in my experience) before this recent shift, outside of religious communities who have always rejected it. But maybe I just didn't notice it before.
As a highly religous teen, but also super horny, I found not servicing myself to be like holding my breath. I knew I was sinning but I could not stop and I felt a roller coaster of guilt and arousal that was I'm sure not a healthy way to be.
But if you want to stop invite Jesus to help. You can beat it together.
I'm not equating porn with sex workers. They are different animals. I know sex workers personally and they have their own set of problems. I say these things not as a puritanical zealot, but looking at it from the other side of having been subject to this world view. In regard to porn, I'm explaining how I lost interest in it. You can judge me for finding it grotesque and abusive, but regardless, this gives me reason to avoid it.
Fair enough. Makes sense.
Good discussion here. That's another angle that doesn't get a lot of consideration
I also have known porn-workers/cam-girls from the early 2000's and have found them lacking. Highly deceptive, reactionary to societial norms, excusing their fetish with making money and exposing their young children to predators. There are those single women that keep it private and have better ethics; but having first-hand IRL experience with people of this personality type turns me off. For me the trick to avoiding porn, and i do find its unhealthy for most if not all men, is to visualize what that person's real life is like and what a mess it would be to invite her into your life. Every woman is someone's daughter, someone's mother, someone's mate and in my opinion no woman that does this is suitable for marriage and motherhood material.
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