Oddbean

real talk, i think what makes me weary of relationships with men is the obsession with online porn men have these days. power to sex workers, but i just prefer men who’s brains aren’t rotted by that.

Porn is a societal disease. It is artificial projections of intimacy which don’t represent your own reality and take no effort or care to produce. There have always been forms of this vice throughout history, going as far back as the first art, but never before has it been so easily accessible and so socially acceptable. I’m not sure how this problem can be addressed, as it’s such a fundamentally individual battle. But we must support each other, especially those around us that we care about, and help them make better decisions for their mind and for their relationships.

100%, and the most annoying part is the discourse surrounding the fact that people think it’s unreasonable and borderline abuse to not want your partner to watch it. like how did things get so muddled

Porn was (in my opinion) one of the major reasons why my first real relationship didn’t work out. It’s a really hard lesson to learn. In the moment, I didn’t understand how much it was affecting my confidence, self perception, and the overall dynamic of the relationship, but looking back it was a huge toxic factor. Growing up with unfiltered access to the internet at 12 and being surrounded by male friends who are all doing the same things is very hard to overcome. I wish I had at the time. Many of the people in my age group still don’t even see the problem. All I can hope to do is to protect my own future children and make sure that they aren’t exposed to the same stuff at that age.

you’re really strong for acknowledging how much it affected you and helping yourself heal. it shows how good you are as a person to realize that. a lot of people won’t ever even acknowledge how bad it is. i’ve had a lot of my male friends refuse to admit that it’s a problem for them, and it’s hard to see them go through that. and it’s hard because women want relationships with men, it’s just very hard in this modern age to have healthy relationships. and i’m so scared as kids are becoming younger and younger and getting exposed to it.

I appreciate the kind words. I hope your friends are at a minimum able to find a better balance in their lives. I have a few friends who are working through the battle themselves, and it’s a lot easier with a positive external influence that encourages you to succeed. I’m hoping that the next generation will be better off than this one. Our parents were very underprepared and didn’t even understand the capabilities of the internet and the extent of the problem. My kids will not fall into the same traps I did, and that’s what progress should look like. I also think the fact that our money is broken and most families need both parents to work plays a role as well. Kids need to have parents which have the time and emotional capacity to watch over them closely and guide them to the right places. When all adults feel overworked and incapable of getting ahead, it’s no wonder the kids are getting into all kinds of terrible things.

One of the biggest issue in today's world. No society ever experienced more wasted semen and weaknesses of all masculine and perversion of all feminine. The seed of life carried by men is a great tool of alchemy and transformation, of true power embedded into responsibility. Yet the market perverted it into a total waste of the human body less than excrement. Porn is war on mankind. And it's not even prostitution. It is pixels on a screen. People think they have similar experiences to making love. But instead they fap at pixels. With their own hand. At wavelength of different coloured lights coming out of their phones. It doesn't smell it doesn't tastes it is not feeling, there is no feedback no electrically charged beings sons and daughters of Earth and God. Waste upon waste of the most miraculous and powerful energy and substance the human body can produce. And it leads to adiction and pain and more adictive behaviour and whatever you do with your sexual energy spreads through every aspect of your life. Yet it is not regarded at all as a practice of health. Not regarded as origin and finishing of life force.

It’s totally possible for young men to control that “need”. People think Jesus was a killjoy, but he was simply trying to protect people when he said whoever looks at a woman with lust in his heart has committed sexual immorality

i understand it sounds dumb, but i’m not going to blame sex workers for doing what they do. there’s a want for that service, and they’re just providing it. it’s still better than women being forced to do it, at least they are giving consent. because if there are no sex workers, someone will be forced to do it. until the demand for the service stops, i’m not going to be angry at the people who provide it.

why are men so obsessed with porn asks the person who posts INTRODUCTORY photos that look like this - LOL #repealthe19th https://image.nostr.build/9c1230f9e705da51fca5845d27700790408d68cfe5912552bcb12f7ee6b2804d.jpg

On the contrary women addicted to their phone sharing every thought staring at a screen half or more of their waking hours every day is 10x worse. Social media & texting has altered womens brains. They can’t say no. Porn is atrocious too. Normalizing getting aroused with your computer and phone has got to be re-writing your brain long term.

I have read quite a bit of the thread. I don't think I agree with you but I cannot make my decision because a lot of comments are like "it's bad" without saying *what* is actually bad. I do not think your profile pic is in that category. But that was just someone's cheap counter anyways. I am curious: in what way do you think about/perceive this brain rot?

i appreciate your note anon. i just believe that it changes in which your brain perceives love and sex in real. it rots the idea that sex is an act of love. this is just my personal opinion of course

I am asking because whenever I see discussions like this, they seem to remain superficial. For example, one has seen many naked bodies. No s.o. will be competing with (the best of) all at once. I have read articles saying that after a certain number of naked men/women, the brain starts to generalize. You look at it differently. However, our ancestors and currently still certain indiginous tribes, are very scantily clad. What if, it means that the brain starts to deprioritize the superficial (often fake, suggested by TV) beauty and instead starts looking for deeper signs like emotional attachment, characteristics, etc. Because those are far less accessible, but also far deeper and more meaningful. I wonder how many times the "obvious culprit" gets faulted for a failing relationship instead of the many other problems that can occur or grow between people. So, that's why my question about brain rot. I would be curious as to any other variants. (In part because there seems to be a lot of prejudice and one-sided attacks.)