85% of Australians huddle in five safe giant cities, watered by enormous engineering works, so we can pretend we're in Europe.

Those pyromaniac trees still kill people every year, despite billions spent combating them. 

 Are you one of the 15% hopping around the kangaroo-eating spiders and over the napalm trees? 

 We're lucky the Emu's allowed us to stay  after their victory ✌️