Oddbean

I have all my life attracted them into my life. I still trying to understand what in me makes us a vibrational match. I think family upbringing. They are incapable of love, which makes me feel compassion towards them, since love is the best feeling and they are "handicapped", from it. Purrs, they are just a little toddler, like your little one, that could not "separate" from mummy. They have the emotional maturity of a toddler between 2 and 4, always in flight fight mode. Survival mode. Always throwing tantrums. There is no love, only shame, like Nico said. They are so fragile they can't even accept a constructive critic. They will react and punish you, for anything, especially when you are the most loving. They can't understand how is possible someone to love what is unlovable. They don't interact with real world like we do. All is an extension of self, a self that did not develop .It's all confabulations and Illusions. Everything happens only in the mind. A relationship with an NPD is just a shared fantasy, inside a mirror room. They project...you, into you. Plus, they have cold empathy which allows them to "read" people like no one. They know which buttons to press just to see you break. It gives them a high. They are so insecure, they need to put others down to feel better in their skin. They don't love themselves, they never received love, by neglect at that young age. I think, somehow, their personality is built on this permiss that they are unworthy of love.

whoa... i haven't delved very deeply into this topic, but it seems like you've had a lot of personal experiences with these types of people. i apologize for my silly comment before... although, i was listening to something @SimplySarah posted a few days ago and while it wasn't specifically about narcissists, the woman was speaking to the types of people narcissists are attracted to. it is a wonderful listen full of great insights regarding boundaries and responsibilities. ^.^ i'll share it here just in case you're interested and haven't watched it before: nostr:note1k9ddgu9m3var8vga7ulwgxm4rzv7xv764agpv3uvjyjmx4qe60ns3gzu5f

I don’t pity them. Though most were born as a result of evil done to them, they give it back in spades. You see, a good person has evil forced upon them and says, “I will not be that. I will be better.” But they do not. Evil is forced upon them and they say, “If this was done to me, the. The world deserves this twice over.” I don’t give them a free pass - they have a choice in their own actions, and they choose poorly. They choose to continue and worsen the cycle rather than trying to break it. If they tried and failed, that is something. But there is no attempt. That would mean facing their own demons. And they have no courage. They don’t even know who they are. I have no pity, no remorse. There is no emotion saved for them. Not even rage. My heartbeats are worth more than that. Took a long time to get here - a long, hard road out of hell. But I believe it to be the better place.