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 Agreed. Based. Satoshi can easily be made into a prophet figure anyway. Most of us already do that. 
 yes I unironically believe this would be a good idea 
 If we get recognized as a religion we can also get very favorable tax treatment in most places.

A lot of this will probably happen organically. The whole Bitcoin inception story is so incredible that it already has a religious air to it, and it's only been 15 years.

What we really need is a formal text which combines the history of Bitcoin and the ideas we want to preserve with real life lessons and virtues that can fill the role of religion. 
 I think someone tried to seriously do this: 

https://en.bitcoin.it/wiki/Church_of_Bitcoin

Not sure what the status of it is 
 I live in this state - their church address is less than an hour from my house

Great lead, I'll do some investigation and see if any of them are still around  
 Nothing can last forever. Our grandchildren will have their own battles, and it may be that abandoning Bitcoin will be the Right Thing.

Saddling people with religious baggage is unlikely to help: not only may you choose the wrong priorities for their future, they will inevitably get warped over time.