@420f26f4 I don't think self-confidence like that can actually come from looks, even if one's looks happens to be what one is focusing one's lack of confidence on. At least for me, if I could do all the things and look like a goddess I would still be haunted just as much by the same traumatic experiences. These issues don't really care exactly what they focus on, but will just attack the first thing they lay their eyes on. Shit finds a way.
Self-acceptance is super hard. I've more or less given up pursuing it in the mirror. Even the rare moments of euphoria when things look good for once do nothing in the end. I think the only way I'll make peace with myself is through trauma work.
Or that's me anyway. Don't know how applicable it is to others, but not entirely useless at least? Hopefully?
“Fighting the world as your authentic self is better than fighting yourself on behalf of the world.”
This quote inflicted on me a severe concussion of the identity, when I stumbled upon it in an unrelated article* back in January 2022.
It set off and guided a months-long outbreak of hyperfocused, ruthless self-examination, where I uncovered my own structural dissociation and eventually identified trauma, a process that quite abruptly led to the realisation, seemingly coming out of nowhere, that I'm trans.
*So what was that unrelated article about then? Being #trans. 🤦🏻♀️
I still have the link: https://www.self.com/story/before-transitioning
[repost from January 1st 2023 on my previous account]
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