being small and light aren't necessarily disadvantages. nor is being soft. most fighters are trained in newtonian, brute force but having an instinct for taking control of someone's levers and being able to roll and take hits while avoiding the impact. i'm sure you have heard of Systema, the training methods are very different to most other martial arts. learning how to soak a solar plexus punch is something you do before you have been to 10 lessons, and what it shows to you is that the damage of a punch only applies to a tiny part of its motion and every other moment it is a vulnerability.

bloody marvellous story though. not hard to see how you built you character with story arcs like that in there. i'm also from the fringes and i have a different set of things but not the success level. yet. and anyway, that's a subjective thing for everyone.