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 yes, I know. but that's just what DNS and the naming authorities solve, isn't it? solving names in a decentralized way is hard but important for usability. 
Namecoin(👴) and ENS seem to be still the best solutions for that part? 
 The naming part is actually easy once everything else is there.

You just start off by using your npub as name.  The resolver is the powerful thing.  Then there are so many paths.

Nomen was going to be the great solution based in bitcoin, but fiatjaf and semisol wanted to kill it, and so it died.

What you need simply is a fair naming system that is a level playing field and with a wide eco system to ensure a small clique doesnt grab the good domains.  

namecoin got rekt and it didnt allow transfers, which was a glaring mistake.  ENS is very scammy and they raised the prices massively.  the fact that there is a "they" is also a problem.

The only solution to this is naming on bitcoin which is pretty a pretty much solved at this point, you would use an OP_RETURN UTXO runes or a soft-fork of runes with an OP_RETURN flag.  But let's see how it evolves.  Have a look at resource oriented computing on wiki for a more in-depth explanation.  But, the npub resolver alone is huge because it gives you decetralized domains and also SSH keys for free, which is a massive upgrade.

https://stacker.news/items/256435 
 why did they want to kill it? 

but it seems to me the naming part is the hard one. It's not solved and needs adoption to work at all. 

ENS is the only one that has current some scale and adoption.  
 forgot to say, also you could tie it into nip-05 too if you wanted 
 which would be again relying on DNS :) 
 
 Yes, bridge to the older system.  Which isnt going away. 
 one last point is that it works out-of-the-box with nostr (and could/should with alby too)

click on settings -> paste seed, and it will generate you a pubky address from your nostr privkey

its actually an ed25519 key z32 encoded, which allows you to use, ssh, git, matrix, signal, gpg, hypercor, Tor, wireguard and much more, out of the box -- something we probably should have done on day 1 
 I disagree with this, I think phone numbers, and even browser address bars autocomplete prove that subjective local naming of keys are enough for the vast majority of use cases. 

I don't need to type your pubky from memory every single time, in fact I don't think I remember the exact handle of every twitter user I follow or the domain of every blog I like to visit.

Even when contacts and bookmarks are not enough, duckduckgo takes me the rest of the way.

human readable names are not worthless but they are not nearly as valuable as people make them sound, and when they are absolutely necessary, ICANN is fine.

Onion addresses prove my point too. 
 interesting, haven't thought about it that much in this way. 
 
 Onion addresses also prove that with the increased number of randomised characters in the domains the end user experience is extremely low and subpar when compared to short names. Long randomised domains create a perfect environment for various fishing scams.