Have you ever listened to or read anything by Stephen C. Meyer on these issues? He is a scientist and a Christian, but he started out as an atheist, and talks about how he arrived at his conclusions. He was on the Joe Rogan podcast earlier this year in an interesting interview. I've listened to him on several other interviews as well, and plan to read his books. 

https://open.spotify.com/episode/3woccDLWFU1cvOcQ5Oflue