Oddbean new post about login | logout I feel bad for guys that are pretty creepy. It’s not like they have good (or any) awareness around their creepiness, and usually leave women within their proximity feeling the ick from their creepy vibes which they don’t realize they are putting out. The real shame is that it evokes so much shame, guilt and denial that there’s no way to really talk with them about it in a constructive way. Almost nobody wants to be creepy, but ironically creepies tend to have the least amount of awareness that makes them all the more creepy. It’s really sad to see once you realize the creepy aspect is then really wanting connection and incapable of it because of their creepy vibes.
Dunning-Kruger, but for creepiness. https://image.nostr.build/8ad7198347a2d27806f2bbd07c40c3a8457f39ddee084f55ff3a98277e323a76.jpg
The thing about that though, is that they are aware of it more than you think, and that's what decreases their confidence and causes even more creepiness. However, creeps would have no problem getting women if these guys actually embrace their creepiness as who they are in this stage of their life and don't see it as a negative thing per se. If you can be confident towards a woman, you can convince many if not most of them that it's actually the shit to be with a creep.
Guy at our place we call him the babysitter. Trust me you wouldn't 🤣🤣🤦🤦
Creepiness is almost entirely a consequence of dishonesty, imo. If a woman says she likes Taylor Swift, and then a guy says, “Oh yeah, I love Swift too!”, but he’s clearly full of shit, that’s creepy AF. Tons of guys think they have to lie and manipulate to get women to like them, and that’s very often what makes them creepy. They don’t know how to actually be honest and confident… but then their consistent failure makes them even more insecure, which only spirals the problem in the wrong direction.
The worst creeps however, are not the easily identifiable ones. Much worse are the ones that seem totally normal, maybe even nice, but strike where and when someone is vulnerable and then try to convince their victim (and others) it was their own fault
