Oddbean

Lots to digest here but I’ll do the best I can without writing too much. First, and most importantly, primal is not a normal nostr client that sources events exclusively from relays. They have their own caching relay that is not comparable with the protocol and they rely on it heavily for loading notes within the app. The network was recently under a spam attack that caused lots of problems for their cache. That could explain harsher rejection criteria for their relay or some of the missing content issues you’re describing. - relay.nostr.band is an aggregator that reads from other relays so even if you do not write directly to that relay it will likely have your events eventually. - relay.snort.social is a paid subscription relay, you have to pay to write - nos.lol has some of your latest posts. Not sure when they appeared though. I’m not sure about the other relays you tried. I think primal sets a random list of 10 which is a very poor way of doing relays selection. Lots of relays are slow, frequently offline, or outright broken. I would encourage you to try another client first to see if that improves your experience. In addition you could consider adding a paid relay to improve your reach and loading speed. @katie and I run a paid relay called nostr.wine so I am biased but don’t take my word for it - ask or look around for recommendations. Welcome to #nostr I hope it get easier from here!

there are clients that set a random list of relays ? okay that explains a bit, i was just wondering why two seemingly random people, who i've never even interacted with, were using my relay that is a somewhat questionable behavior imo 🙁 nostr:nevent1qvzqqqqqqypzq0vy9tlv6h3f8u5tvcnexdcy50acec2n42ga0y9tz8m2w5k5ffpdqqsxzst39de08zdwle0u48p7pl7jsjmv7w6tykqunaduvwh4q4g9m4cpyvkgv

it's not that i really mind people using my relay, but there should be a TOS-like thing probably ? i like doing database analysis (for my own curiosity), so by using my relay you consent to this also i reserve the right to toss out what doesn't spark joy 😀

Thanks for taking the time to shine some light on this @Mazin I'm still trying to take it all in. There is indeed a big difference in experience between for example @primal and @Coracle. The thing is that you don't know what you don't know. So all felt normal at Primal for a while, but looking at my profile in Coracle, I see different messages, replies, etc. It's a new brave world for me to get into. One step at the time. But tips like yours definitely help!