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 With bot-nets that steal CPU time from massive numbers of insecure random internet users. 
 Exactly. 

Without Monero around to monetarise lazy security practises, they'd be ransomware victims instead.

Is that really better?

This way, at least the crooks are using some if the stolen power to do some good (securing a private payment network). 
 It kills the main advertised benefit of random x, which is that an average user can mine some at home. 
 I do mine #monero at home (using solar).

Returns would be negative if I was paying for grid power, true, but that's mostly about my government's very foolish energy policies. 
 I do the same, for similar reasons. 
 ALL commodity returns (including the mining of digital assets) will fall to the marginal cost of production.   Which is necessarily less than the overall per unit cost of production because of capital costs.

In other words, it's impossible to remain profitable if you're producing commodities. 
 If the capital cost was already defrayed for another purpose (and mine was), the CAPEX to invest in mining Monero approachs zero.

That is the beauty of CPU-only algorithms. 
 Good point.

However, in practice, almost everyone for whom this would be a benefit is paying retail electric rates.

This also ignores the bot-nets that drive the difficulty much higher because the operators are passing off the capex AND electricity costs. 
 True enough, on all points.

But almost everyone in Western countries ought to invest in a little solar anyway, purely to have some electricity during those periods when poor policy choices make the grid unstable and/or unaffordable.

If you also use your surplus solar for mining, some beautiful synergies are to be had.