It never was your fault but rubbing it in doesn't help anyone 

 Whether you salt or sugar a wound, either is a great disinfectant. 

 I'm never going to say "I'm sorry" for speaking the truth. If they take that as me rubbing it in, that's their shame, not mine.  

 I like this C.S. Lewis quote because it is so true:  
"
Of all tyrannies, a tyranny sincerely exercised for the good of its
victims may be the most oppressive. It would be better to live under
robber barons than under omnipotent moral busybodies. The robber
baron's cruelty may sometimes sleep, his cupidity may at some point
be satiated; but those who torment us for our own good will torment
us without end for they do so with the approval of their own
conscience."