Oddbean

where else in the world they say get stuffed? lol? ol mate who popularised the expression dilligaf that i'm pretty sure spawned idgaf might be familiar with you: Quite often I get to thinking how as kids we got by Like at Christmas time at our house we couldn't even afford a fire But we made do with what we had back then when I was young Dad used to suck a peppermint and we'd all sit around his tongue We couldn't afford no sparkling tinsel for our Christmas tree So we'd just wheel old Granddad in and make the old cunt sneeze (ahh-CHOO... wheel him round the other side nanna) But things changed pretty bloody quick, I've got kids now of me own And I heard 'em unwrap their pressies, last night when I got home Hey Santa Claus you cunt, where's me fuckin' bike? I've unwrapped all this other junk and there's nothing that I like I wrote you a fuckin' letter and I come to see you twice You worn out geriatric fart, you forgot me fuckin' bike If I'd a' wanted a pair of bloody thongs, I would have bloody asked And this cowboy suit and ping pong set you can shove right up your arse You've stuffed me bloody order up, it's enough to make you spew But it's not just me who's snakey, me sister's dirty too Hey Santa Clause you cunt, where's me fuckin' pram? You promised me you'd bring me one, you remember who I am Cause I'm the little girl what you made sit right on your hand I'll give you fuckin' ho ho ho, you forgot me fucking pram Next time I come to see ya I'm gonna punch you in the guts And I'll let your fuckin' reindeer go and kick Rudolf in the nuts You just wait til next year, when you get back to that store And me and me little sister come stomping through the door And we'll say, yeah you wait for it: Hey mum's and dad's you smell his breath and check his bloodshot eyes And don't listen to him boys and girls cause he tells fucking lies He's just a piss tank and a pervert, and he's not even very bright Cause the old fuckin' wanker forgot me fuckin' bike Hey Santa Claus you cunt, where's me fuckin' bike? I've unwrapped all this other junk and there's nothing that I like I wrote you a fuckin' letter and I come to see you twice You worn out geriatric fart, you forgot me fuckin' bike Fuckin' dob you in you old cunt Tell me old man on you, he'll punch your fuckin' lights out I saw mummy sucking Santa Claus