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 I'm the newbiest beginner who has done the first half of soooo many beginner courses and at this point I think I need to just stumble through making the ugliest SOMETHING. everything feels so cool here. maybe this is the time I actually code  
 Nothing beats making something when it comes to learning.

Even better is to make something with someone more experienced.  It gives you a leg up. 
 And nostr is a perfect sandbox for crazy ideas and mvps. 
 That what I'm thinking. I know I can learn anything but I've gotta dive in, and I struggle to hold myself accountable on my own projects. I've done a lot though like jailbreaking consoles or getting into Linux and I think I could probably be useful somewhere  
 If you're familiar with consoles you could try building a simple console app with C or C++ on Linux.

If you like making graphical UIs, HTML, CSS, and JavaScript gets you all the web development basics. 
 Thank you for the advice! As far as c or c++, I recently learned about #demoscene and bytebeat and it seems super rad and over my head.