Using Primal Web or Primal iOS you could set your relays in Settings -> Network. Open Network settings (apps might prepopulate with some popular relays) and make a change to the list so update gets triggered. This does not make changes to your NIP65 relays. Afterwards it should work. 

I hope other apps are not clearing relays from contacts list when using NIP65. 

Anyways we plan soon to improve relays handling across the entire platform so this is only temporarily.