IMO the key isn’t not to care, it’s not to think about it. 

I used to think I could consider what people thought and get myself to the point of not caring, but then I realized it doesn’t matter whether I care (as I have been conditioned to) as long as I don’t think about it. 

The conceit was that I could care and then overcome that caring, but the *much* easier solution was just notice if you were thinking about it and stop. 
nostr:note1hqgm5sgakuur2hzesr4kufylf2uyqlpvas93a78m5d7kswvaf7cszjlhrp 

 good point. reality is our shared delusion but your reality does not automatically exist inside mine.