What if you're honestly a dick  

 🤷‍♂️ 

 Then go speak with the other dick users on your own dick relay 

 And then you can have a wonderful little circlejerk away from everyone else that doesn't want to participate 

 Honest gets first priority 

 People I'm excessively nice to I usually don't like , which is a form of dishonesty 

 I'll only listen if you've folded a fitted sheet 

 people who you have to be nice to are pompous assholes

everyone else gets friendly 

 I struggle with this one. When I was young I was definitely too nice. These days I’m probably too honest. It often doesn’t go down well