I considered quitting nostr.
I considered just creating a personal (real name) account and dropping this one.
I considered converting this one to my real name.
Ultimately I deeply fear rejection.
A deep sense of worthlessness.
Of feeling hated.
I've seen hate here pointed in my direction.
Having been told I "add no value" by a certain user, it caused a wonderful agony. For that I'm grateful.
Self hatred. The part of the ego that cannot be overcome, but must be embraced.
I've said some dumb stuff on this profile.
I also feel attachment to some profound moments I've recorded here. Even if it's just screaming into the void.
Oh what to do.
#asknostr