I hate marshmallows, except on smores.
Last time i went to make some though, the dang ingredient list on modern 'mallows gave me SSPS.

What are these alternative marshmallows you speak of, i need to know for science.  

 SSPS?

Uh... Let's see... 

https://www.food.com/recipe/homemade-marshmallows-no-corn-syrup-384069

No corn syrup in this recipe.  

 Sudden Soft Pp Syndrome 

 LOOOOOOOOOL!

Gotcha!  

 Feel free to use that at you leisure. ;-)