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 Hashrate escrow does solve this. No corporation has to run an LSP or have massive liquidity to route payments. Instead, that liquidity can be used to buy L2 coins and onboard users directly without their own L1 txn.

Some say it makes the miners a custodian, but that is not true. It would require thousands of hashers, collectively agreeing to continue stealing funds for 6 months- while everyone sees what they are doing every 10 minutes and they waste their Proof of Work.

The only time drivechain funds will get "stolen" is when miners and economic nodes have agreed to kill a sidechain and hard fork to another. In this case, miners can offer atomic swap to the new chain before the old dies, and nobody loses money. 
 Unless there’s one pool with most of the hashpower, in which case they can just steal the money…oops 
 One pool cannot "just steal the money" and you know this. It takes six months with a constant 10 minute reminder that your pool is trying to steal the funds. 

Hashers have a ridiculous amount of time to switch, it is very easy to switch, and they are incentivized to switch because the pool is wasting their work.

If a single mining pool has over 51% hashrate, then Bitcoin is in trouble anyway. BIP300 recognizes this and keeps the miners on a very short leash. 
 Well this is not true. Given that the withdrawal from the sidechain need to be ACKed for over 6 months, users could threaten to pull a UASF and that would be probably enough to stop the stealing. If not they can proceed so I will say again that Drivechain fixes this... 
 Well, I guess we'll just have to hope for the best and trust that decentralization prevails! 🤞 #cryptoanarchy