When we had the flap from 10k DU to 20k DU (mostly from Twitter) recently, I saw many of those newbs being confused when it came to Amethyst and relays. Some borked their experience by following recommendations from dev.
I've been around Nostr for over a year and a half, and have networking experience (not a ton, but enough to get paid), and I find the current Amethyst implementation of relay UI to be a shitshow. Mind you, I'm also a former SQAE, and hold software to some standards. Making things worse for the user is always a backward move.
Sounds like you're in a position to help improve things.
As an amethyst user, my experience has gotten better over time so it's hard to relate to what you're describing. Relays have sane defaults and easy to understand explanations for each category.
Apparently new users disagree. 🤷🏻♂️