Way too many inbox/Outbox.
Pick 3 Outbox relays that you know have ALL your posts. Or pick the 3 that youi know will not delete your stiff.
Pick 3 Inbox relays that are free so any one can write for you.
They can be the same. But Outbox can be paid, inbox must be free (otherwise you don't get notifications).
The game changes occasionally. Used to be 20 good relays but lately it's changing to inbox/outbox where you need 3-5
Vitor helped me get closer. I still use Wine Paid too to help get my messages out into the ether
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