Oddbean new post about login | logout Would you rather adore someone you love or be adored by someone that loves you?
Leaving the "rather" aspect aside; It is important for a man to be the adored, and in working hard to stay attractive to his woman. Therefore it is in both parties' best interest that the woman is the adorer in the relationship. A woman who has a man adore her will inevitably make her lose attraction to him. Many women will disagree with this statement but experience tells me otherwise.
I fourth this. Never love a woman as much as she loves you if you want a happy relationship
This is correct and it's just nature.
Seems like women are the only ones that don’t understand this lmao
This is true. It’s been buried for centuries under layers and layers and mountains of illusions from the Romanticism. There might be a little confirmation bias, but every couple I’ve seen without this has been struggling too much unnecessarily. And it’s understandably hard for women to come to accept that.
Oh yes, the fairytale beliefs start at a young age and are not dispelled until late 30's at best for most. And it's strange how taboo the topic seems as well, when all we try to do is establish what system will stay afloat in the long run. I would also point to certain powers at work, such as inflation making it harder for many men to be a proper provider and safekeeper, thus making it extra hard for the women to be the adorer.
Women are muses, men are the Gods.
At least that's the role they should play, indeed. We are too focused on **who** we are, and not enough on **what** we are, when it comes to dealing with the opposite sex.
Feminism disavows adoring men at all costs, explains a lot
Most women still prefer to adore men. It’s just that the bar has been raised a lot.
You have to overcome this wall of feminism, I think a lot are too far gone to ever really adore. Unless you have a yacht then you're good lol