I disabled Amethyst's notifications because I'm using Pokey which is hooked to my private inbox relays. I haven't had any DMs since I setup Pokey, but I'm assuming that it will be able to deliver DM notifications. Could you send me a DM to test that?
I don't know if Pokey is already AUTHing with your Amber key. That will be required to see your DMs.
I didn't get a Pokey notification for your DM, so I'll add nos.lol as you suggested. Hopefully that will trigger a notification on DM.
Maybe a future version of Pokey will be able to auth via Amber to allow reading the DM relays.