I believe you must be an intelligent person, so this must be willful ignorance or something.

A common unit of account is how we determine relative prices between two items.
I CAN decide to price sats or anything else in big Macs or ballpoint pens if I want. It's mostly meaningless to anyone else because there's no common frame of reference.

In actual fact, one bottle of water is about 0.25 BigMacs ( Depending on your geographical region, of course)
But the ONLY reason that ratio is reached is because of their fundamental unit of account, the US dollar.
*What the goods are priced in*

You don't get away from the unit of account just because you're measuring against a different commodity. That's the unit that you're using to do the comparison with.

I mean, this is like super obvious.