Correct me if I’m misinterpreting - but with this framework, gender is more of a descriptor for a set of behaviors than it is an indicator of a biological trait?

I 100% agree that biology isn’t black and white - every individual is incredibly unique. 

However, in my day to day life, when I use gendered words it is because I’m treating someone differently based on their projected biology, not based on their behaviors. 

Aside from a few transgender coworkers who have asked for me to use their preferred pronouns, it makes much more sense for me to express gender under that framework than under a behavioral one. 

If I gendered based on behavior most people would get offended, and if gender was just 100% what someone else tells me it is then it doesn’t hold any real meaning anymore. I’m trying to approach a very touchy subject with an open mind and respect, but could you see why many people would be confused by that?