Oddbean

I dress like a dad, listen to dad rock, drink coffee americano like a dad, tell jokes generally associated with dads, and various other points, but it seems it’s all just a cargo cult and I lack the core of that “dad energy”

Yeah in my case, it was someone who had gotten hurt, and I went through the entire process of properly treating and bandaging the injury, and then had in my tool bag additional first aid supplies that aren’t provided by work that I pay for out of my pocket. (I keep in my tool bag a bottle of Advil, a bottle of Tylenol, a bottle of antihistamines, a bottle of ibuprofen, and a bottle of generic midol) And I was asked, why do you have these in your bag? You surely can’t need them yourself. And I responded with, I have them for my coworkers when they are needed. I would rather spend five bucks per bottle of medicine every couple years, than for one of my co-workers to need to go spend $5 for two Tylenol in the vending machine. And she looks at me, and goes, “You know, I thought you were always mad about something, and kind of scary, but you’re not scary at all. You have big dad energy.”

Yeah more and more people need "dads" or someone who will look out for them in that way. Dads will have that foresight, a certain seriousness and practicality in nearly all things, but also proper patience. You'll notice most people lack nearly all of these things.

Yeah, out of my group of friends in college, I was always the “group dad” doing my best to make sure everyone didn’t fuck up too badly. And that’s why I have a scar from a drunk Latina biting me after I took away the rum, and a blood oath because I saved the life of a different one. The dude got extremely sick, and had a fever of 105 and we dragged him into the hospital despite him fighting us because he was hallucinating that we were demons trying to drag him to hell.

Dad energy is just seeing everyone but you as a child. Dad energy is being the kind of guy who can drive in a snowstorm and make her feel like everything will be totally fine as long as your hands are on the wheel. You’re a captain to serve and delegate, a security blanket that makes everything be okay just by following in your presence. That’s why being a weepy, emotional faggot undermines it so hard. The world is scary enough for girlies without having to worry that their captain is blubbering vagina like them

I’ve long advised guys to achieve mastery in something and instruct in it. When you start teaching students in something, you see the initial phases that used to freak you out for the small starting steps they are. Then you just mentally copy that feeling of being in charge, in command, over to your private life and act the same. It tends to come w/ experience, where you’ve seen things before and no longer freak at novel situations. But you can fake your way there. LARPing is just the forced, knowing act of pretending your way towards something. People LARP in every career, just unknowingly, nitting the fibers of their persona over and over until they one day wake up and realize they ARE what they wanted to be once upon a time.