Five things your wife needs to hear on repeat:

1. I appreciate your unseen proof of work;
2. You are very beautiful;
3. I will always HODL you;
4. Your hair is glorious and so are your bitties;
5. Righty tighty, lefty loosey. 

 Wait. A min. What is #5. 

 How to screw and unscrew  

 Gotcha