Defining a term "civility trap," and explaining why nazis wear suits, and why Obama never gets angry:

A civility trap is where a Black person receives an intentional provocation. If the Black person responds with understandable frustration/anger, they are perceived as unreasonable / unhinged / untrustworthy. The original provocation is forgotten.

If they respond reasonably, another provocation will follow. And more. Hundreds more.

Nazis wear suits to try to make the contrast even greater.