Which would you recommend? 

I use Zeus paired with my node, but we can’t expect most to do this.

I could use lndhub and let all of my family use the node, but that doesn’t really scale. 

 I have used zbd, primal, Wallet of satoshi (outside of usa), or none custodial and Phoenix but i find it cumbersome. 

 It doesn’t scale? How fast is your family growing?! 

 Scales to the family, but not beyond.