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 In the simplest way, yes. Private relay is basically a paid relay doesn't accept payments 😅 and your npub is whitelisted (you can publish for free) 
 so its only purpose is back up? it doesnt protect me from anything?
yes I do use VPN, TOR, etc, but just wondering. 
 Yep, just private in the sense of private /use/ 
 does my nostr private relay grow in storage size indefinitely? 
 I'd imagine so long as you have the storage capacity haha 
 so my understanding is that the media we upload on any client isnt stored on our private relays or any relays at all but on a web server.  so those things do expire even if we use a private relay right? 
 There is a proposed spec to have files stored on relays (relays are servers too) but its not something most devs/relay operators want because it introduces legal liability. 

The text containing the URL link to some image host is stored as text.  

the image is rendered through the client because it recognizes the link as an image or video. If you dont own the server, then yeah the image can be modified or deleted. Nostr.build is a service to upload your media to. They can still modify your media but @fishcake is a nice dog! I trust him to be responsible with my files 🥰🐕🫂🫶 and not eat them like my  homework or lunch 📓😭😖🍖 
 Shid… I was about to go and chew on some videos and files, but since you insist I’ll pass. 🐶🐾🤣

On a serious note, we do return a cryptographic hash of the stored media that can be used to verify that the files hasn’t been tempered with 🐶🐾🫡 
 Ahh! So we can see if you've been chewing on the videos! 👀🦴 good to know 
 Videos, I’ll chew for sure to optimize for a mobile streaming and all that jazz, so don’t count on it. Once/if/when content hash is available, that would be suitable for this. Since we want to optimize each client’s viewing experience, I can’t promise that we will not compress/resize images further 🐶🐾🫡 
 I don't think the liability is any different whether it's snuff or hate speech these days. The government keeps getting bolder about how far they declare themselves to be free to spy on us, it's completely out of control.

It would be better if you didn't have to trust one person or organisation to keep your data live. For one thing, if you had your own relay, easily deployed and part of your keychain suite you could be keeping it alive even if no other copy has been made, just add a second one and you are good for 1 failure.

Peer to Peer is going to be necessary to make this thing work for the reasons of government intrusion.