I think the disconnect is believing people voted for Trump.

Many voted against the Democrats including many people that have voted Dem their whole lives. They gaslit their base saying there was nothing wrong with Joe Biden for several years, only to have a weekend rendezvous coup and install Kamala as the candidate over holding an open primary, and then they resumed the gaslighting by saying Trump was "the end of democracy" yet they literally just committed an equivalent act on their base. 

This was after nearly the last decade where they kneecapped Bernie, pushed multiple prominent young party members out (while doing some heinous shit to them) like Tulsi Gabbard, as well as vilified a portion of their wealthy donor class. 

Finally, the majority of America is relatively moderate/centrist. Pretty much every election was a candidate that was just slightly left or right of center but within the last decade the Dems also decided to crank the volume on that from a 7 to bat shit crazy.

Extreme candidates pushing their narratives like the Squad. The DEI movements that saw many people lose promotions or jobs to someone that was not equally qualified just to hit a made up quota. The insane push for trans everything -- tell me how every celeb just happens to have multiple LGBTQ kids wanting to be the opposite sex when that would be a statistical anomaly? So on and so forth.  

People got fed the fuck up. They voted against the Democratic Party more so than voting for Donald Trump. Moreover, the fact that all of the discarded Democrats that joined the Republican party made it look more like what they were used to via what their party had become. 

All the party needs to do is return closer to the center and they'll be fine. That should start with burning down the co-opted DNC. So, if you actually care about the Democratic Party, that is where your hatred and vitriol should be placed, and you should mobilize fellow Dems to demand change from within.

But hey... Orange Man Bad. Amirite?