Great post!  Welcome to NOSTR.

My youngest has Down Syndrome and had a bunch of major health problems when he was little.  Because he needed my attention so much, it was easy to give what little energy I had to him alone.  (His health problems included frequent breathing problems, so I never once went into a deep sleep for 2+ years and therefore was barely functioning.)  Because it was so hard to give anything to my older son or my husband, I had to schedule them in.  I always devoted 30 minutes to my eldest son, every afternoon during my youngest's nap time.  It would be tempting to use this time to get household chores done or to try to rest, but even though my oldest was pretty self-sufficient, he still needed Mom time.  I've never regretted that time with him and we are close to this day.  (He is now in college.)