I think you’re confusing things. The reason it feels cozy is because you’re in a community of mostly like minded people. 

If we make Nostr to exist where there can be many communities like this then we’ll be able avoid the push for centralized authority. 

And while you may feel great about how Nostr works most folks who get harassed just leave. Either we build tools for people to regulate their own communities or people will return to centralized platforms. I mean even 4chan has mods. :)