Do I have to pay capital gains tax if my eggs doubled in price before I ate them? 🤔


😂
Yes! That is only logical!


Beware! I wouldn't say that too loud, they might take you seriously...


Yeah I’m pretty sure there’s a section for this on the 1099 form


Yes.

-IRS


It’s only illegal if you get caught


Yes, as a government stooge you are expected to tattle on yourself and maintain an understanding of price fluctuations in the commodity market.


Probably, they’ll figure out a way to tax that too. Looking at the numerous taxes it seems one cannot sneeze without a tax


Trick question…. Bc it’s the purchasing power of the dollar going down. Not the price of the egg going up??😂


Only if you made a profit on your poops. Then it’s 36%.


Only if you sell


In a way you’re saying the purchasing power of the egg has increased. I need to get some chickens…


If you have your own chickens, you must pay income tax and capital gains tax from the time you earned them until the time you ate them. It only makes sense.


Please don't give them any new ideas. 🤣


yes. and you have to pay inheritance tax if your child is eating them


Great thinking! Don't forget to report all the Black Friday deals on the following Monday as well.


Yes.


Yes, but you can mitigate the taxes by claiming transport and storage fees.


With a cbdc, they would just deduct the amount each time the eggs went up in price directly from your bank account, connected to your smart fridge. Your biometric data imolants would collect information about you eating the eggs.


Dont give those mofos any ideas


(If you drive a car, car) I'll tax the street
(If you try to sit, sit) I'll tax your seat
(If you get too cold, cold) I'll tax the heat
(If you take a walk, walk) I'll tax your feet
Taxman


Fire🔥


Only if you sell them


Absolutely, eating the egg means you are realizing its value. HODL for a year to lock in the long term capital gains rate.


they don't give refunds for capital losses though. heads i win, tails you lose.


No, you only incur capital gains tax if you receive something in exchange for the eggs with a nominal fair market value greater than the nominal fair market value which you exchanged or invested to obtain the eggs.  Capital gains do not result from consumption, only exchange.


Buy steak.
Freeze for 1 year.
Sell frozen steak for profit.

==> free money


make unlimited money with this ONE weird trick. Wealth managers HATE it


proof of steak with an APY


Do I have to pay capital gains tax if my eggs doubled in price before I ate them? 🤔


Don't give them ideas.


😘 https://i.nostrimg.com/2497e13ec188002ff0358e71633ad6aa329b615870305daf615d22089ec3dd8c/file.jpeg


+1 came to say this. 😅


😂😂 if you live in the US, yes!


Hello Ser,
 This is tha IRS. Send gift card to IRS.iamascammer.com pls. We count ur eggs and you not declare profit.

IRS agent


I’ll let you know whether the Service™ comes after me offering capital losses on all muh zaps, should be a dead giveaway


Works even better on the hoof. With a bonus of free field trimming.


Paying tax is a choice. 😉


When price of an asset goes up because value of USD goes down, you have to declare a taxable “profit” when you sell your asset for more USD than your basis, despite the purchasing power of the USD proceeds being less than at the time the asset was acquired.


Seems legit! 😂


Those year old eggs are always the best tasting too. 😆


Only if you sell them