I lost my good boy today. My heart is beyond broken. His spirit was strong and he tried so hard to stay on, but his organs started failing him. 

Up until yesterday I refused to let emotions get the better of me and was trying so many different things to bring his toxic level down. But last night as I was taking a shower, Fido had a surge of anxiety and tried to go up the stairs to look for me. He has been so weak that I have been camping in the hall with him and we have not gone up to the room this week. That’s when I knew. They said when it's time, they will look for their person - and he came looking for me. After that he went on rapid decline. 

We had his home administration of sub cut infusion, his gastric concoction, various liquid food, even vanilla ice cream to soothe his throat, his vet has been on back to back house calls - but he was no longer responding. 

All I could do was to give him his belly rubs and gentle massages but emotions came rolling in. I told him to take his time and I think he didn't want to let me go just as much as I wanted him to stay. Even until his last breath he wanted me to pet him. 

He has been my happy moments even when times were hard, and a constant joy.  He is my shadow and side kick in everything I do and I cannot imagine a day without him in it. 

Last lesson from Fido - when you love, just love.