I think if we want to see nostr adoption, relay experience has to improve 10x. Too many issues too often that the user has to troubleshoot constantly. If the dev has to say "oh that's because...{plug in any explanation / excuse here}" to reply to why something isn't working, that's a failure. 

I know I'm gonna get a bunch of replies about proof of work on this, so just save those replies for yourself. It's a non-starter. 

Unless a relay is being used for a community or something, or as a paid service, users shouldn't have to contemplate which one to use. 

The same goes for blaster, or any service that relies on relay performance for it to work properly. 

We can never blame anyone for using blaster, or for not using small relays, or for only using large relays. All of this must be solved at a technical level behind the scenes where the user doesn't have to think about what is the correct way to use nostr.