my longest relationship was 3 years. then two others that were about a year, and most about 4 to 6 months. nothing has been crazy long term but i dont think i self-sabotage. i probably ended things 50% of the time, she ended things 40% of the time, and maybe 10% of the time it was both of us saying "this isn't working".  from my end, it's usually something that makes me second guess her character or her as an eventual mother. (one girl, for example, hit the DOOR CLOSE button repeatedly when a mom and 2 kids was trying to get on the elevator. i was shocked.)  i think i need to shake things up. i have been at the same gig for 20 years in the same house that i own for 20 years. but i dont know. thank you for the reply.