Amethyst does a lot. And it will always use a lot of data and connections. And we will push for using more for sure.
That doesn't mean it is "unnecessary". That is exactly what our users want.
We want to do it all, and if we do, we are loading ALL of it, all the time.
As a relay, you have the option to block what requests you serve and which events you store. With the outbox model that we now implement, we only hit relays that might have the info. And that's how small relays win. We are the largest userbase app that is at this level.
In fact, we are even pushing for dynamic limits which allow relays to have more power to limit the client on demand.
https://github.com/nostr-protocol/nips/pull/1434