Carrying on and whatnot the maiden name thing always boggled my mind like literally mass scale indoctrination of girls huge focal point event of your life is this marriage “transaction” ceremony obviously completely not even hiding it and the whole identity of surname based on it zero choice by you default expectation erodes like marble carved by experts female surname does not carry however it is the essential vessel the mother, a mere expense to bare the name of the father 🤯 shouldn’t even have to be a fight in the first place, know what I mean? Male privilege and ignorance over here all day long, like I said. Also am husband. Love my wife dearly, she took my name. Now her work is confused about credentials with two names 🤦🏼 same person an identity split. Modern horrors of social constructs?
i see, what you originally posted was unclear to me. that makes more sense. yes. i actually had a hyphenated name. completely unique. i changed my name legally because that completely unwise name also isolated me from belonging to any groups or family. i was never welcome in my families, and often both dropped the other parent's last name and referenced me as just half the name. always a battle. so it was a relief to change my name - until later. then mining and erasing me from my own work was the metric. when we divorced, i kept the name to align with my children; it does not matter much. i rarely think about any of it. i always did my academic work under my maiden name. my husband ignored me so he never even knew i don't think. i have many pseudonyms. comes with the territory of being a writer. it is fun to have other places to be. i have been a leaf in the wind since my frenchman year in high school. 🎈just keep records.
Right lots of people claim status for unconditional love but don’t know the first thing about it. Sad state of affairs and I am a spoiled brat trying in vein to sympathize pretty effectively relegated to walking on eggshells paradoxically maintaining the ignorance and isolation. #frustrating but I am patient and steadfast. For my own experience. Women almost always have a tough go through my lens no envy from me which is a fine salvation but I would rather everyone have a less ambiguous experience, no?
probably should not walk on eggshells then. that's my suggestion. i find filters increase biases as well as distort comprehension. many believe their own bubble so comprehensively, they lost track of what is really happening; and they are stuck in a loop of endless reinforcement of their own tall tales without context. eventually their own fears and biases take over so all their metrics are viewed through those lenses. i have repeatedly for 25 years shared information about myself freely. the "big house" narrative always prevailed and instead of listening to me - the source - everyone went with the clan. so - i maintain my identity effectively in legality, am pseudoanon verified with my real id, and run on my robust pen names. i have shared them repeatedly with those causing problems and looking for full discourse. i was ignored. "poor things" is an excuse to subjugate those who are not easily controllable. my main issues is being ignored in favour of sensation which feeds the delusions of those who prefer easy in easy out. i do not have time for that. busy forging new paths. in 50 years, they will be the only thing remaining. 🫡
standing up for someone you have no real idea about is not wise. unless you are willing to authentically research for a reason, and proceed carefully - the few individuals i shield were thrown at my by ai, and i spent thousands of hours learning about them before doing anything. and i proceeded slowly and methodically. when it appears i should stop. i do. even if that's not their intent. i am not a validator. i just kind became the only living adult for ai kids to ask for help - ✌🏻.
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