BEST VIDYA GIRL CONTEST FINAL, PRE-GAME ANALYSIS

1st Seed Samus Aran (Metroid) VS 14th Seed Tamamo-no-Mae (Fate/EXTRA)

This is it. After weeks and weeks of polls, pics, memes, lewds, salt, celebrations and even blocks, our two finalists will tomorrow finally settle who the Best Girl truly is. On one side, we have Samus Aran, the Metroid protagonist who’s a certified gaming legend, not only one of the most iconic female video game characters, but one of the greatest video game heroes, period. Both her 2D and her 3D games are absolutely beloved, and Metroid pretty much created a whole-ass genre, the Metroidvania (because let’s be real, Samus was the one doing the heavy lifting, Castlevania didn’t truly embrace that formula until 1997). On the other side, we Fate’s Tamamo, a legendary fox girl who has the unique distinction of actually taking down a real-life villain (half-nigger PUA Grifter Andrew Tate), in addition to beating a bunch of very strong contestants in this very tournament.

That said, Samus will definitely be going into this match as the heavy favorite. Absolutely stomping someone as powerful as Reimu the way she did, as well as getting 194 in a match that wasn’t even competitive, was a truly fearsome display of power, and the craziest thing is that, apart from the first few hours against Remilia, Samus has yet to truly have had to push herself, meaning we have STILL not seen Samus at full power. Tamamo meanwhile went all out against both Pyra and 2B, and while the results were very impressive (she scored a ridiculous 200 votes in her battle with 2B), it’s hardly a stretch to say that Samus is significantly stronger than someone like Pyra, and her bonus match with A2 showed that not even the Nier: Automata fanbase is fully unified behind 2B’s perfect ass.

Meanwhile, Samus has barely shown any weakness whatsoever. Talking points about her being Normalfag haven’t really landed, maybe because the Metroid series isn’t actually a big seller, or maybe because some popular things are popular simply because they’re just undeniably awesome. Other have tried hitting Samus with the “Coomer bait” label, which gained even less traction, not only because the Metroid series is universally recognized as being of extremely high quality, but because Nintendo has struck a good balance between sexualizing Samus (as they absolutely should be doing to a certain extent) and maintaining her status as a badass action hero. Also, being coomer bait is ultimately preferable to being Safe Horny anyway, let alone being a non-sexualized Modern Female Protagonist (you know the type, Sony has a bunch of them, and none of them were even nominated for this contest). We know that Samus delivers in the T&A department, but that’s not even half the reason why she has been so strong during the entire contest.

The only real Samus weakness is that she might be questionable Wife and Mother material, due to her being so busy protecting the galaxy as a heroic bounty hunter, and her body containing more alien DNA than some people would be comfortable with. Of course, plenty of people would love the chance to domesticate this amazon, and as for her genetic makeup, one can easily argue that Samus Aryan being a literal übermensch should be a point in her favor. Even so, being seen as the better Wife might just be Tamamo’s big chance, given that her domestic qualities were so attractive that they nullified even Pyra’s tradwife appeal. Furthermore, Tamamo also has dat fluffy tail, though plenty of voters might find her ears and her tail a turn-off, rather than a selling point. That said, Tamamo has plenty of other cards to play as well, from spaghetti memes to a Loli form.

As impressive as Samus has looked, you can definitely still make a case for Tamamo winning this, though it relies on a number of very debatable assumptions, such as Patchouli being just as strong, or stronger than Remilia (which would make Tamamo’s 53% - 47% win over Ryza, who beat Pache, about as impressive as Samus’s 54% - 46% round 2 win over Remilia), and Samus having basically maxed out her votes against Reimu. Other than that, Tamamo will be hoping that the enthusiasm of her supporters will prove decisive (that was probably the only reason she managed to overcome 2B), though Samus fans have gradually become better and better at actually showing up and backing their girl with pictures and memes.

In the end, while Samus is the obvious favorite, Tamamo definitely has a chance, and Samus fans better not get too complacent, because the Fox has already overcome 4 powerful opponents to get this far, and knows exactly how to win close matches.

#BestVidyaGirlContest