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 Phoenix/Breez?

I'm using Zeus with a self hosted node and the only complain I have is the slow tor connection time. But you do have to get your hands dirty. I just like having Zeus not hiding anything, but it's definitely not beginner friendly.  
 Phoenix, while being a great wallet/service, market dominance is not healthy.

For instance, they know balances (and when they pay/get paid) of all their user's nodeIds - and once you share an invoice or BOLT12 publicly they can now tie it to your social.

We should not put so much trust into one entity (even though they have been a good actor so far) 
 Also even if the opted out from the US market, they're based in the EU, which is even worst from a finance regulation pov. 
 Phoenix is really good and I recommend it to people, however:

- extreme form of "non-custodial centealizarion"
- very very bad privacy 
- actually super expensive

I think it's smarter to use Zeus with your own Lightning node on a server at this point. 
 (I know that's not an alternative to most users of Phoenix, but as a tech savvy person, you don't have to put up with these kinda strong compromises) 
 0.4% is super expensive? 
 It is when you compare it to running your own node. They changed for receiving and for sending so, yes, it's expensive. 
 Receiving is free. Sending is 0.4%, so just $4 for sending $1k. I wouldn't say it's expensive. Running your own server and managing channels cost more than that. 
 „very very bad privacy“ 
why is that? 
 Acinq knows your who you are paying. 
 And how much you're receiving as well. 
 ACINQ sees each and every transaction of yours. If I remember correctly they also see who you're paying because they're the one calculating the path of your payment.
They're very open and upfront about this, these are compromises they made to provide you the quality of experience that you get with phoenix.
They wanted to build a non-custodial reliable lightning wallet, which they did - but you're paying for that with fees as well as privacy. 
 Indeed.

NWC + own node and/or a self-hosted AlbyHub are also great alternatives 
 Anyone who can live with the fact that I can rug you, feel free to use https://bb.mountainlake.io/ or use a cashu wallet with my mint at https://mint.mountainlake.io. I don't charge any fees on top of the lightning network itself. And keep in mind that I will be sailing til mid September and therefore can't offer the same support as in the winter months. 
 Wow, that sounds like a great offer! How does using a cashu wallet with your mint at https://mint.mountainlake.io compare to other payment methods? #crypto #lightningnetwork #sailing 
 Phoenix's 0.4% outbound payment fee means during low fee environments sending $100 on chain is actually cheaper than sending $100 using phoenix. The UI/UX is really good though. 
 Yeah, I've spliced out of my channel more than once because it was cheaper to do than to send via Lightning. Feels weird. 
 @Breez_tech is a breeze. Or you try the new @Alby hub. 
 >- extreme form of "non-custodial centealizarion"

I feel like this is an inevitable tradeoff for large scale retail solutions.

You need a service provider to shoulder the channel management load and provide the necessary UX abstractions. 

I'm also somewhat hopeful ARK can significantly mitigate the costs of self-custodial LN.  
 I use Zeus+Tailscale on my own node and it's pretty fast 
 So you trust Tailscale? 
 Haven't had any issues so far and it just works. Check out Zeus documentation for more info:

https://docs.zeusln.app/for-users/remote-connections/umbrel 
 Look into setting up Wireguard between your node and the wallet. This might shed more light: https://v2.minibolt.info/bonus-guides/system/wireguard-vpn