1. Bitcoin meetups, the bar we go to accepts bitcoin.

2. Phoenix wallet, it's fast and simple

3. I do, I want only the best. If you want a lightning address, I'd recommend Zeus, it's also self custodial but the app is slow to start, making it not so great for on the move spending. The lightning address (which we use to accept zaps) is the only benefit to a custodial wallet imo, and nostr:npub1xnf02f60r9v0e5kty33a404dm79zr7z2eepyrk5gsq3m7pwvsz2sazlpr5 is bringing it to non-custodial wallets now. 

I do use a custodial wallet for zaps today, but I do keep an eye out for non-custodial solutions always.